Gracefully Old
by Sapphonic
Summary: Cosmo Martin wants to follow his mother Susan Lewis’s footsteps becoming a doctor.His first day at the County reunites his mother&her friend Abby for first time in 20 years.Not all past news are good news...Chp 9 now up Cosmo's moods are becoming unstable
1. 2025

**"Gracefully Old"**

**Summary:** Cosmo Lewis-Martin wants to follow his mother Susan Lewis's footsteps becoming a doctor… His first day at the County reunites his mother and her friend for first time in 20 years… Not all past news are good news…

**A/N:** Med Students are not called Doctors… what do they get called? Mr?

**Spoilers:** Some referrals throughout the story.

**Warning: **Chapter 3 may be disturbing for some… deals with rape (I'm just warning to be on the safe side)

**

* * *

**

Chapter 1 - 2025

A tall muscular young man walked through the sliding doors into the ER. He scanned the area with his prominent green colored eyes to find where the admit desk is situated. He walked to his designated area and looked around to find a clerk.

"Yeah" The young clerk answered, jerking his head rhythmically while listening to his music on his iPOD.

"I'm Cosmo Martin, I'm a 3rd year student. This is my first day and I'm suppose to be meeting the ER chief" He introduced himself with the simple Martin, avoiding the long hyphenation.

"I'll page her"

"So erm you want me to wait here?" Cosmo asked, pointing down to the ground. The clerk nodded in reply.

Cosmo rested his elbows against the counter and watched the ER world go by. He felt a firm nudge on his arm by a petite woman who is in her mid-fifties who smiled wryly at him.

"Mr Martin?" She asked

Cosmo nodded

"Hi I'm Dr Lockhart, I'm the chief of ER," She introduced herself, shaking his hand. Cosmo instantly recognized the name and face from his mom's old photographs when she worked here. He thought that Abby has not changed a great deal except aging fine lines on her face. She still had youth in her. The graying in her hair tied up in a bun would give away her age.

"So Mr Martin, what's your first name?" She asked, putting her hands in her lab coat pocket. Underneath she is wearing a white blouse and a pair of dark slacks. Cosmo lets out a little laugh. Abby stepped back. Gently folded her arm and frowned, wondering what was amusing him

"You don't know who I am do you?" He asked, trying to play a game of guessing.

"No" She replied in a low tone and shook her head, Cosmo had a New York accent, and she couldn't recall anyone she knew so well from there. She vaguely said, "Should I?"

"You knew me when I was a toddler"

She chuckled "I knew a lot of toddlers in my time"

Cosmo replied "True" He leaned himself against the counter. "But you were really good friends with my mom"

"Your mom?" Abby tweaked a little smile and narrowed her eyes to think for a moment. Muttered to herself "Martin… Martin?" Her face brightened up and gasped, "You're Susan Lewis's son right? Oh my god!"

Cosmo nodded and laughed.

"You look so much like your mom, you have her smile, so how is she these days?"

"She's great she runs the free clinic at Long Island, New York" Cosmo said, running his fingers through his mousy colored hair "Actually she is in town today to a conference"

"Oh my god I must see her again"

"I'm sure that wouldn't be a problem, she would be thrilled to see you again"

"So I see you followed her footsteps then?"

"Yes"

Abby's pager bleeped. She looked down. "I've got to go to trauma 3. Dr Novino, our chief resident he will be with you shortly to show you around" She said "I'll catch you later"

"Thank you" Cosmo stood waiting at the admit desk watching Abby walk away.

* * *

Later that morning a woman in her mid-fifties walked in. She was smartly dressed in a business like suit, skirt and jacket. Her hair is shorter, greying with hint of ash blonde. Her figure is more somewhat chunkier... Her eyes are fixated at the interior of the ER, amazed how it has changed with more modern technology equipment … the wafer thin PC screens. Even though she uses them at her clinic, she found it bizarre looking at them as she expected the County to look exactly the same 20 years ago. She noticed the colors of the walls still the same. Faded and in need of an emulsion, to clean it up. Susan Lewis half smiled looking at her trip down memory lane. 

"Hello?" She called, leaning over the counter. A young guy ignored Susan, sitting down, busily listening to his iPOD. "Excuse me, hello?"

Susan sighed and walked round the admit desk. She firmly tapped the young clerks shoulder. He is startled by her presence.

"Hey lady, you shouldn't be round here!" The clerk shouted, pulling out his earpiece.

"Well I wouldn't be doing this if you were doing your job properly instead of lounging round listening to music all day"

"What you know about working here?" He snapped

"A great deal actually" Susan answered pursing her lips.

"What do you want?"

Susan scoffed "Oh is that how you greet people?"

"How can I help you ma'am?" He asked, in his sarcastic tone

"I was wondering if I could speak to my son please?"

"Who is he?"

"Cosmo Martin, he has just started today" Susan nodded

"Hey Mom" Cosmo smiled, patting his hand on his mother's back and then looked at the clerk "It's ok I'm here"

"Hey sweetie how's your day going?" Susan smiled as she rose herself up on her toes to plant a kiss on her son's cheek.

"You know a bit daunting, finding my way round" Cosmo shrugged.

"It takes time"

"I met the ER Chief" He grinned broadly

"Nice" Susan nodded and frowned at her son's wide grin "A female I guess, oh Cosmo don't tell me you fancy her!"

"Probably would if she's my age, but she's old!"

"Pleased to hear that"

"I think you and the chief should concentrate on each other"

Susan shook her head "What the hell are you on about?"

"You can see for yourself," Cosmo pointed at the woman approaching them.

Both Abby and Susan jaws dropped to the floor when they saw each other.

"Oh my god Abby!" Susan shouted, spreading her arms out wide.

"Susan!"

They rushed into each other embracing into a hug. They squeezed each other with laughter.

"Susan you're so… chubby!" Abby commented shaking her head looking at her old friend.

"Speak for yourself, you should see the size of your ass!" Susan snorted.

"Yeah well it's the middle aged spread" Abby chuckled "You still got that little snort in your laugh!"

Susan stifled a laugh as they felt joy over the reunion. They are buzzing and overwhelmed at looking at each other after 20 years of losing touch. They cannot get over how they aged especially that they had memories of each other when they were in their thirties.

A red headed frail woman in a electric wheelchair rode past the two reunited friends and halted as she realize who was present, so she stuck the gears in reverse and moved back, she whip-lashed when it braked hard. She looked at Susan with her eyes peering over her glasses.

"Susan?"

"Kerry"

Weaver grinned and shook hands with Susan "So what brings you back here then Susan?"

"Well I don't know if you have met my son yet?"

"Your son? Is he new here? I might bump onto sometimes in the near future. I only work here part time, as I am semi retired. I come in to do the hospital's bursary"

"Great at least it will keep you active" Susan said then winced as she realized what she had just said, something politically incorrect about Weaver.

"Yes it does, I must go now, maybe catch you later?"

"Later" Susan grinned.

They both watch Kerry Weaver drive the wheelchair down the corridor at full speed.

Susan shook her head. "Oh boy, it didn't surprise me that she will be whizzing around in one of those. How old is she now … 65?"

"Yeah sometimes we have to watch our toes if Kerry's having a bad day because she's like a road rage"

"Jeez that's fun" Susan curled up her top lip. "So Abby do you have time for a coffee?"

Abby replied looking at her watch. "Sure, I finish my shift in 10 minutes"


	2. Tragic Hero

**Chapter 2 – Tragic Hero**

"So erm you ever get married again?" Susan asked. Sitting down comfortably. Grabbed the electronic menu card and quickly glanced at it.

"Yes I did" Abby answered vaguely, sitting down opposite.

"Oh my, I thought you said you wouldn't!"

"Well you change when you're older" Abby shrugged.

"Coffee?"

Abby nodded. Susan tapped on the card to order two coffees. The days with waiter and waitresses taking orders are long gone. They still exist, they only bring the items. These days everyone orders electronically, which transmits to the serving counter. Ideal for people who like to take their time to order their food and drink.

"What does your husband do?"

"He's dead" Abby answered quickly.

"Oh? I'm very sorry" Susan apologized; she cocked her head forward scanning the menu. She is trying to avoid asking the question _how did he die?_ "So you've been at county all these years?"

"No I left about 10 years ago, I left to look after Maggie"

"Oh.. Is she erm." Susan winced; trying not to say _is she dead then?_

"Yes she gone now. I had to care for her when she diagnosed Alzheimer's, what a combination, Bi-polar and Alzheimer's. You bare not to think. She had the condition a few years but it got progressively worst. Tried to put her in a home at first but she was too stubborn eventually we did manage in the end. That put my mind at rest but I had a persistent problem with the home. They would keep phoning me at work, at home even in the middle of the night. It got so bad at work; they were on my back about the issue. The whole thing has caused a tension between the hubby and me; our sex life completely went out of the window. Every time we got intimate the phone rang! I decided to quit county and go to care for mom. I was temporarily separated from my husband; the only time we had a time for each other is that he had to divide his time with Chicago and Tampa Bay. He would come over every weekend and sometimes in the week depending on his work schedule. It was suppose to be temporary but it lasted a year. Maggie didn't do anything but terrorized the carers. The home never had such a large turnover in employing staff there! Maggie got frail and weak. When she died I came back to County after I heard a vacancy for the chief".

"Oh? I'm very sorry"

Abby half smiled at Susan, looking sympathetic. The assistant comes to the table, handed out the coffees.

"So what's Carter doing these days?" Susan asked, thinking that he might be taking an early retirement due to his stinking rich inheritance.

"He died… Carter was my husband"

"What?" Susan gasped, putting her hand in front of her mouth "When?"

"2 years ago"

Susan's face turned into sadness from the shock of hearing the news. "Oh my god! I'm surprised no-one informed me"

"We did try get hold of you but you moved on somewhere else." Abby taking a sip of her coffee.

"I moved on to run a free-clinic" Susan bottom lip started to quiver and tears welled up in her eye. "Sorry. I can't get over that, was he ill?"

"No he was killed"

"My god!"

"John was out on his business meeting. He was making his way to the Union Station to meet a respectable client. Minding his own business with a daily newspaper under his arm and a coffee in the other hand. A little girl's dog suddenly broke away from its leash and ran on to the road. There was a truck coming down the freeway. The dog ran out in front of it, barely misses it. To her reaction the girl ran after her pet. The driver of the truck as he realised the girl came running out from nowhere. Slammed on the brakes and the truck jacknifed. The little girl froze on the spot as she watched the truck skidding along. John's instant reaction was to save the girl by running across the road, pushing her away. Unfortunately it was too late … the truck hit John, killed him instantly. The girl lived; she was laid on the floor when trailer swung round. It would have decapitated her if she's had been standing up. I feel so angry with John, he underestimates his capabilities, keeps forgetting that he is not as young as he used to be."

Susan tears rolled down her rosy cheeks, she grabbed a napkin from the dispenser, wiped the tears away from her eyes and blew her nose. Choking back the tears, she said "He always been above his capabilities, that's just Carter…"

"I'll never forget that day. I was on my day off. At home, having a crisis with our daughter Robyn."

"You both had a daughter?" Susan shook her head, _Abby's a mother!_

"Yes she's 17 now"

"Carry on hun…"

"I suspected that our daughter was hiding something from us. She blurted out that she was pregnant. I went ballistic because John and I always stressed those facts about sex education. Keep yourself protected but we misjudged her naivety. I was trying to control my emotions at the shock. I was so angry. I was yelling the place down at the fact our daughter is only 15… and pregnant. Robyn sobbed her eyes out. I was dying for a cigarette, haven't had one since I fell pregnant with her. There was a knock on the door. It was the police. I thought _shit!_ They've come round to see about a domestic disturbance. No. They told me there was a tragic accident and they wanted me to identify the body. I started to tremble and managed to calm myself down, trying not to get worked up, as the body could not be John's."

Abby paused for a few seconds and drew in a deep breath before carrying on talking.

"The police took me to mortuary. They pulled out the body and uncovered the body. God … my world came to an end… it was John. The shock was asphyxiating. I was in pieces, kneeling on the floor. Hysterically beating against the floor, trying to get rid of the agonizing pain. I did this in front of the police officer. He tried to comfort me, the state I was in, and it had triggered him off too. John lay there looking peaceful. His grey hair was matted with dried blood, I barely recognized him because of the oedema on the side of his head from the impact. The rest of his body was black and blue. He died of internal injuries. His body was literally crushed as a result from the impact. I left the mortuary feeling empty and numb, trying to figure out how to break the news to our daughter. I broke down again it when it dawned on me that Robyn was carrying our first grandchild, the child that John will never get to see. He would make a fantastic grandfather"

Susan blew her nose again. She placed her hand on Abby's and gave her a gentle squeeze. She can see the sadness in her eyes.

"I'm sorry" Susan mouthed in her cry. "I last time felt like this being upset after losing a colleague was Mark Greene"

"The funeral…" Abby sighed, "It was the biggest turnout I've ever seen in my life, it was like if he was someone important like the president"

"He was important… important to you and Robyn"

They both sat there in silence drinking their coffee for a moment. They shared a few glances and smiles.

"I still can't believe that you two did finally get back together in the end" Susan putting her mug down.

"10 years we been married, yes"

"Why didn't I get a wedding invitation?"

"Because he whisked me off to the Bahamas on surprise trip and got married there"

"How lovely, how romantic"

"Just like what you and Chuck did, got married in Vegas the spur of the moment"

Hearing Chuck's name wiped Susan's smile off her face. She sat back with uneasiness. The past she wants to forget… It has tarnished her for the rest of her life…


	3. Tarnished

**Warning:** Some may find this chapter disturbing, deals with rape.

**Chapter 3 – Tarnished**

"So are you still married to Chuck?"

"No" Susan replied looking down at her empty mug. She sat in silence running her fingertip round the rim.

"Susan?" Abby cocked her head looking at her friend.

Susan looked up at Abby and half smiled.

"Are you ok?" She asked raising her brows. "Was it a bad break up?"

Susan nodded. "Yep" She looked out of the window.

"I'm sorry"

Susan nodded again and sat in silence.

"I'm going have another coffee, what about you?"

"Yes please" She leaned over towards Abby and looked in to her eyes "I haven't talked about it since it happened"

"What was that?" Abby answered, putting her glasses on to look down at the electronic menu card. She ordered two more coffees.

Susan laughed at Abby "You look like a cute old lady with those specs"

"Shut up!" Abby scolded playfully and smiled.

"Well here goes my life story for the past two decades. Let me think… erm I got married again to a paediatric surgeon whom I met after I left Chuck. My husbands name is Robert; He is five years younger than me, it was love at first sight for him when he met me on my first day at my new position. I was deeply attracted to him but I wasn't ready for another relationship, after splitting up with Chuck. I wanted to get my life back together, concentrating on bringing up Cosmo. Robert and I became really good friends, which was good because it took things slowly between us. Eventually we went on date and it went from there, we got married. I had two more children, a girl and boy. Rosie is 19; I fell pregnant with her shortly after dating Robert… so I have no room to talk about your daughter because I'm no better! Anyway she's at college studying journalism trying to follow Susie's footsteps"

"Your niece Susie?" Abby interrupted "Gosh she's must be nearly thirty"

"Yes she's 30 and works for New York Times, she's married with two children"

"You said you had another boy?"

"Yes Cameron, he's 15 still at school"

"Cameron? How Scottish of you Susan!"

"Robert is a Scottish descendant, his surname is Macintosh"

Abby nodded "Ah" She bit her bottom lip and asked, "Why did you and Chuck split?"

Susan paused for a moment. "Ok, I'll tell you why, this is the subject I like to avoid"

She shook her head and takes in a deep breath. "Chuck and I broke up because we were not getting on. We never really did after stupidly getting married in Vegas. I think we really stuck together because I fell pregnant with Cosmo, as you already know about that… When I moved back to Phoenix again, things got worst between us. Chuck would come home most nights drunk, sometimes too drunk to have responsibilities looking after our son. There are times where I get a phone call at work from the day-care, telling me that my husband has not picked up our son. The thing is our relationship mainly broke down due to lack of communication. I got to the point that I couldn't stand him at all; I don't know why I stuck with him? Maybe it's habit. I used cringe every time he wanted to have sex. He wasn't interested in making love; he was just selfish like rolling on top of me. I let him get it done and over with for a quiet life. Otherwise If I said no… He would beat me senseless".

"Bastard!" Abby gasped, "Susan, I'm so sorry, I had no idea"

"I woke up one morning. Packed up my things and left. I drove Cosmo and myself all the way to New York, leaving my new job. I turned up at Chloe's door; we had to laugh because Chloe's the one who does the turning up at the door. She put me up until I found a place of my own. I found a position as an Attending at a hospital in Manhattan. The same hospital where I met Robert. I didn't care the fact I dropped from being a Chief to an Attending, at least it was a job and something to keep the roof over our heads. I spend many weeks looking over my shoulders watching out for Chuck. I didn't know whether he would turn up thinking that I might have ran off to my sister's"

"You've had your ups and downs" Abby commented sipping her fresh mug of Coffee. "So erm did you ever see Chuck again?"

Susan nodded. "Yes"

"And?"

"And what?" Susan said defensively

"I didn't know if you had anymore trouble from him?"

"Too damn right I did, that's why I said to you earlier I haven't talked about it since it happened"

"You don't have to talk about it Susan, if you don't want to" Abby shook her head "If its too painful for you?"

"Yes I want to talk about" Susan said, leaning forward resting her elbows on the table. "You were my best friend and you should know about this"

"When you're ready" Abby cocked her head forward with her eyes peering over the top of her glasses.

"This is one of the reason why I lost touch with you guys after fleeing from Phoenix to the Big Apple"

"We all lose touch from time to time when we move on, it's part of life"

Susan took a hard swallow "Anyway Robert and I have been dating for a few weeks and one evening we were invited to a Fellowship ball, Chloe babysat Cosmo overnight. It was a beautiful night and the atmosphere was great, I thought it would be boring; they were only going to talk about nothing but the rights and wrongs of surgery. I wore this beautiful dress that blew Robert away. I so felt good because it was the first time..."

Susan sighed, gleefully.

"…I felt so happy for god knows how long. I fell in love with him and he made me feel like a human being again. He was a very passionate man; he gave me something I never experienced before. Anyway it was the end of the night, Robert and I got a taxi home until he got paged. Taxi dropped him off at the hospital first. He said he would go straight home if it got too late for him to come by my place. When I got home, I stood on the doorstep rummaging through my bag to find my keys and a male approached me. I wanted to scream when I realized it was Chuck. I was so shocked at how did he manage to find me in New York? He knew Chloe's address, he went from there. Would you believe that he was stalking me for a week?"

"That's so creepy" Abby shuddered. "What did he say to you?"

"It's what he did to me" Susan replied taking another hard swallow. "He was angry that I took his son away from him. Ok. I understand that but I wasn't going to prepare to put up with his shit anymore, his drunken arguments leading him to slap me about. I'll tell you something, the night before I left, I was laid in bed asleep and got disturbed by him staggering in. I moaned at him for not picking his son up earlier and regrettably said to him that he was an inadequate father."

"I wouldn't regret saying that" Abby interrupted

"You would if he was physically strangling you after you said that? How did I defend myself? While he was pressing his thumb against my windpipe. I was choking for air; I managed to reach for the bedside lamp and whacked it round his head. I looked at the sorry ass, he was laid there unconscious on the bed."

"I can't believe that had to go through that Suse" Abby scoffed in disbelief.

"That was nothing compared to what happened that night when Chuck turned up in New York… So I said you that he was angry… I asked him to leave. He refused to do so; he wanted to know why I left him. I told him the obvious reason and he begged me to have him back. Give our relationship another go. I said go to hell and that he had made my life a misery. He wasn't happy the fact that I screwing about with another guy. I said it was none of his business considering we are no longer together or ever will be. I must have hit a nerve because Chuck lost it. He slammed me against the wall. I tried to fight him off. I struggled because he was so strong. He punched me round the head, I was seeing stars from the blow; he grabbed my keys from my bag and unlocked the door. Then dragged me into my home and knocked me to the floor"

Abby's eyes widen, putting her hand in front of her mouth.

"Next minute I woke up from the fuzziness, I was on my back with my wrists zip-tied together to the banisters at the bottom of the stairs. The lounge door was ajar, I could see Chuck eating and flicking through the channels on my television. He turned round to look at me; he had evil in his eyes. I cannot believe this is not the same person I once knew… I never found out why he had changed over night? Alcoholism?"

"I certainly wasn't a violent person when I went through my lean phase" Abby said, sitting uncomfortably mentioning about her past addiction with the drink. "Then again it can affect people in different ways"

"Yes it made Chuck violent… it had made him a monster… After I woke up, he walked up to me and complimented me saying how beautiful I was. How sexy I looked in my dress. He straddled on top of me and leaned over to kiss me, I moved my head away. He gripped my face and scolded at me for moving away when he tried to kiss, instead he licked across my face. He was stroking my hair and my cheeks. I was trembling; I was so scared wondering what he was planning to do next. He was so unpredictable. He started to grope my breasts and tracing his hand all over me especially down below. I felt sick because I did not belong to him. He said it was ok for him to touch me as were together. I begged him to leave me alone, and then he unbuckled his bent and ripped my underwear off. I tried to squirm away from him but he managed to force my legs open for him to enter and pounded his body into me. He raped me four times that night. It felt like eternity when he finished and my mind was numb. I was praying that he wouldn't kill me, hoping that I will be alive by the morning. Visions of leaving a son behind flashed through my mind. Before he left, he said to me that he would be back for more. After he left, I was still tied up, I spent all night lying there bruised and humiliated"

Abby sat there with her eyes welled up; She had feeling of anger and sadness. She took her glasses off to wipe the tears with a napkin and leaned forward to gently clasped hold of Susan's hand.

"He should be strung up by the balls," Abby seethed. "Who found you?"

"The Police and Robert. They noticed at work that I hadn't turned up and not answered my home phone, cell or pager. Robert was getting increasingly worried that I have not showed up and at lunchtime he called the police to assist him at my house in case of anything like a hostage or murder…"

"I bet Robert was devastated"

"Yes he was… Robert was fantastic for standing by side, helping me pull through. He was cut up all right; it took time for him to come to terms with what happened. He gave me all the time and space I needed. He stood by me when I found I was pregnant and there were doubts about who was the father… His or Chucks. I fell pregnant because my pill had failed. We waited until Rosie was born to take a DNA

test… Thankfully it was Robert's"

"Did the police catch Chuck in the end?"

"Yes they did eventually, they found him in working in Alaska, at a hospital doing his Flight Nurse job. It took a year to track him down and they had to warrant him to come back to the New York state for the trial"

"What did he get?" Abby gently folded her arms.

"Oh god only between 5-10 years" Susan replied in a bitter tone "And probably got released on the minimum time"

"Yes justice sucks in different states, one state says 15 years and another 5 years"

"So I don't know what he's doing now, doubt he's a nurse, he might lost his licence after doing time, quite frankly I don't give a shit!"

"What about Cosmo?"

"He had wondered about him, he is aware what had happened. He doesn't want to know Chuck. He sees Robert as his father and he has been his father figure bringing him up"

Abby rose from her seat and walked round to sit next to Susan. Gave her a hug. She said, "I'm so sorry, I'm devastated"

Abby's pager bleeped. She rolled her eyes when she looks down to read.

"Typical…" She muttered "I've finished for the day and they want to me drag me back in there" Abby stood up straight from her seat.

"You better go" Susan rose up on her feet.

"How long are you in Chicago?"

"A few days" Susan replied. "I've got a conference tomorrow and I'm helping Cos and his wife move in their new home, she's arriving on Wednesday"

"Oh your son's married?"

"Yes to his childhood sweetheart and I have a 2 year old granddaughter"

"Oh wow that's make two of us, grandparents," Abby chirped, "I didn't get the chance to tell that Robyn had boy, his name is Jack"

"Jack? Isn't that a pet name for John?"

"Absolutely" She smiled wryly "I just wondering if you wanted to come around for dinner tonight?"

"Oh I'd love to, Cos is working late and I'll probably be sat in my hotel room tapping away on my laptop" Susan grinned.

"Ok my place at 7 o'clock" Abby smiled. She pulled out a piece of paper, scribbled her address and gives it to Susan "Here… this my address, in case you have forgotten your way round Chicago"

Susan sat back down in her seat and She watched Abby leave the coffee bar and through the tinted windowpane overlooking the busy street she watched her cross over the road back to the hospital.


	4. In Loving Memory

Spoiler referral: 9.18 - Foreign Affairs

**Chapter 4 – In Loving Memory**

"Let's get him up to OR" Abby instructed, pushing the gurney out of the trauma room into the corridor. Abby walked to towards the admit desk after noticing Susan standing around looking for assistance. She snapped off her gloves, tore off the yellow protective gown and threw them in to the trashcan.

"Are you ok Susan?" Abby asked.

"Yes I was hoping to catch you" Susan replied "I didn't get chance to ask you because your pager went off"

"What is it you wanted to ask?" Abby rubbed her nose.

"Can you tell me where John was buried? I would like to visit his grave"

Abby blinked hard at her. Susan half smiled then winced, She regrets asking in case she might have upset her.

"Sure" Abby answered after a long pause. "He's buried at Rosehill Cemetery and you will find him next to Gamma"

Susan nodded "Yes I know where it is exactly"

"Dr Lockhart, we need you in trauma 2" A nurse shouted from a distance.

Abby rolled her eyes "No rest for the wicked"

Susan grinned "Thanks Abby, I look forward seeing you tonight"

Abby walked away and then swung round to look back at Susan. "Oh can you give John a kiss from me?"

* * *

The sunlight is slowly penetrating through the rain clouds, thunder rumbling from the distance. Susan is driving her SUV along the road and the wipers are swishing left to right at high speed as the rain beating down heavily against the windscreen. She glanced round to look at how the place has differed from since she was last in Chicago. New modern buildings dominate the suburbs and the only old ones are still standing are the churches and the historical buildings like town halls. The EL is still in use. The tracks have been replaced with galvanize steel which doesn't rust like the earlier tracks which has to be repainted after a period of time. The frame that held the canopy that covered the stairways used to be wooden has now been replaced with the same metal. The trains are now high-speed bullet shaped. Your next stop would be matter of seconds…

The rain has stopped when Susan arrived at the Rosehill Cemetery and Mausoleum. She indicates to turn and drives along the road into the cemetery passes under a railroad overpass that obscures the view of Rosehill's beautiful main gate. The gothic looking building is beautifully built in a white colored limestone.

Susan stepped out of the SUV with a bag over her shoulder, an umbrella in one hand and the other a bunch of carnations. She shuts the driver's side door and strolled along the road. She takes in a deep breath of newly rained crisp air and starts scanning around where John Carter laid to rest. Susan is now kicking herself as she is trying to visualize where exactly where Gamma was buried, as she said to Abby earlier that she knew it well... She has only been once before when she accompanied John when he came to visit her grave on the first anniversary of her death. It was vague as it was 23 years ago; as you get older your memory starts to fade… Susan remembered that the plot was near a monument with the name inscribed _Bernstein_ and the Carter family burial was near a tree, as she would never forget when she was told about Abby's brother Eric turning up drunk on Gamma's funeral, he climbed up the tree and fell from it into her grave.

There were numerous people wandering about in the cemetery. There was an elderly woman dressed in black, praying on her knee against a headstone, she presumed that she still mourning after her loved one. Susan looked around for the monument and the tree. There were dozens of them all over the 350-acre land. It's all started to come back to her as she strolled along the left side of the road and spotted the _Bernstein_ monument.

As her eyes searched for the grave she stepped across the grass towards the tree, she nodded at the gardener nearby who is trimming away the grass. Susan carried on looking and she spotted the _Millicent 'Gamma' Carter_ headstone. Other familiar names from the Carter family like John's brother Bobby who died of leukaemia and cousin Chase who overdosed himself to death from his addiction to drugs. Susan felt a lump in her throat when she saw John's name next to his grandmother. His headstone is an ogee shaped granite in visage blue color. The writing is inscribed in roman italic…

In Loving Memory

Dr. John Truman Carter III

4 June 1970 – 14 May 2023

Beloved husband of Abigail

&

Doting father of Robyn

'_Gave so much, took so little, who put others first'_

Susan crouched down and leaned over to place her carnations into the flower container on the left side of the mount. "For you…" She said softly trying to stay strong, organizing the flowers nicely. She stays put for a minute, studying the grave, paying her respect.

"Oh god…" She muttered; her breathing is getting heavier and erratic.

"I'm sorry," She shook her head as she mouthed in a strangulated voice. Susan struggled to hold back her emotions by placing her hand over her mouth and shutting her eyes tight as she breaks down in tears. She pulls out a tissue from her pocket to wipe away her tears and blew her nose.

"I erm… don't know what to say, so much happened since I last saw you" Susan shrugged her shoulders looking down fiddling with her tear and snot soaked tissue. She spent a moment talking away about how her life has been, like getting married again, more children, success in her career and so on.

"This is from your wife, Abby" Susan kissed her hand and placed it flat on the headstone. She rose up to stand up straight and winced as she rubs her calf strained from crouching down. Susan looked up at the sky after lightness starts to fade; the black rain clouds are forming. Her hair flickered against the strong breeze as she rummaged through her bag and pulled out a make-up compact. She opened it to look at herself in the mirror, wiping away the mascara smudges from under her blood shot red eyes and gently dabs the powder on her face. Susan frowned as she forgets how much she aged.

"I'm still the same person inside but on the outside I look old, wrinkly, graying in my hair, my waistline expanded" She chuckled looking at the headstone and joked, "I heard your hair turned white like your father hmm… I bet you have a bit of a middle aged spread round your belly? Ok… ok… who won the competition? Who looked the oldest? Me…I won because your Abby still looks great, beautiful and still has that 'youth' in her"

Susan startled herself when she glimpsed at a man walking past along the road, who looked like Chuck. She blew out a sigh of relief. She heard a cry and a slump from behind. Susan turned to look. The gardener is lying on the floor clutching to his chest, in agonizing pain.

"Is it your heart?" Susan asked after she rushed to his side.

"I've… got… angina," He cried with pain.

"Have you got your Nitrate spray with you?"

He nodded, "In my bag on that monument"

"Ok you stay calm while I'll go get your spray"

Susan dashed to the monument and opened his bag. Her jaw dropped to the floor, when she saw all the drugs contained in his bag. He was like a walking chemist shop, seemed that got more supply than a drug dealer. Susan lifted the bag and walked back over to the man then crouched down next to him. She removed a red bottle and then sprayed it directly in his mouth.

"Thank you" He gasped

"What you know about angina spray?"

Susan smiled "I'm a doctor"

"My name's Bill Mountjoy" He puts his hand out to shake hers "Your name?"

"Susan Lewis" She replied

"Thank you Dr Lewis"

Susan grinned, "How are you feeling now?"

"I haven't felt right since I got up this morning"

"I think you should go to the hospital to get checked out"

"No I don't want to go, I've got all the medications I need"

"Yes you have too many by the looks of it" Susan nodded, she picked them out one by one looking at the bottles "Ramipril, Aspirin, Tylenol, Tremolo, Bisposphonates, Antiemetics, oh I give up counting"

Susan looked at the man; he was laid there lifeless…

"Mr Mountjoy?" Susan shook him firmly. Puts her finger on his wrist to feel his pulse, _no pulse_.

"Oh my god!" She straddled on top of him, with a little struggle, as she is not as flexible as she was. Started chest compressions, then leaned over to pinch his nose and blew air into his mouth. She can feel his chest rising from her air. Then repeats the CPR.

During her attempts at CPR on the man she managed to reach for her bag to get her phone out and dialled 911.

"Paramedic!" Susan gasped. Feeling out of breath from her reps. "I'm a doctor, we need one urgently at the Rosehill Cemetery, man in his 60's with Myocardial Infarction"

By the time paramedics had arrived, it was too late. Susan's attempt to bring the man back to life was unsuccessful. As she watched the body being taken away, the rain started to fall heavily. She was already soaked by the time she collected her umbrella and belongings. Susan walked back to her SUV and drove off making her way to the hotel to shower and change, ready for her dinner date with Abby.


	5. Young, Old and The Gifted

**Chapter 5 – Young, Old and The Gifted**

"Mom would you mind looking after Jack on Saturday night please?" Robyn asked with her son resting on her hip.

"You are asking me to stay in on a weekend night?" Abby swung her head at her daughter's direction, raising her brows and forced a smile. She is wearing her hair down, past shoulder length flowing with waviness, still a hint of brunette in it, naturally highlighted with gray and white. She is busily chopping up the onion and throwing them in the pan in preparation for dinner. The onion had made her eyes water; she wiped them with her sleeve. She blinked hard and widens her eyes to focus again from the blurry vision.

"I don't ask for much"

"Don't you?" Abby said with sarcasm.

"Ok I've got date, I really like this guy Jimmy and I don't want to miss it" Robyn waved her hand and swapped hips, as Jack is getting too heavy to stay in one place. "Please… I don't get chance to get out often after being tied down with this little guy"

"Like I said you should have thought about it before sleeping with Chris back then" She frowned.

"Gee thanks Mom, sounds like you didn't want the grandchild after all"

"Robyn don't be like that!" Abby jumped from Robyn's offence "I wouldn't change Jack for the world, I was only stating the principle of things"

Robyn scoffed at her mother.

"If you're going to be like that young lady you shall not be going on a date" Abby glared at her.

"I'm sorry it's just I'm so excited ok? Anyway you can have a nice cosy night watching a movie with your squeeze"

"Squeeze? Is that what you call him?" Abby mouthed and winced "Thanks"

"Is that a yes or a yes?"

"Where's the _no_ in your question?"

"There isn't one"

There was a knock on the door. Abby cocked her head at her daughter to answer it. Robyn walked through to the hallway headed straight to the door with Jack still sat on her hip.

"Hey" Susan grinned with a little wave and gasped at Robyn "My gosh you are the image of your mother!"

"Gee thanks!" Robyn dropped her shoulders, rolling her eyes. "Hi you must be Susan, come in" Signalling her in with her head.

Robyn is the image of Abby, long flowing brunette hair, same facial structure but she doesn't have her mother's amazing pout instead she has inherited her father's thin lips. She also has his eyes and his tallness. Robyn's skinny frame stood at 5ft 8 ins, almost eye level with Susan who is an inch shorter.

"Hello…" Susan spoke in a babyish voice to Jack, tugging his cheek as she enters the hallway. "You must be Jack" Jack smiled putting his thumb in his mouth and turning to bury his head shyly into his mothers shoulder.

"Mom told me all about you"

"Good things I hope…"

Susan's eyes marvelled at the interior of the Carter's residence. They were still the same pictures up on the staircase wall that she remembered from years ago. John inherited the house after his parents died, even though he was not the eldest child. His sister Barbara who is the last living in that intermediate family decided to stay put in Switzerland, which she has lived for nearly four decades. Susan noticed there was something missing, no servants in the house…

Susan followed Robyn into the kitchen to meet Abby. She is standing at the sink washing the chopping boards and utensils. She turned around, grabbing a towel to dry her hand.

"Hi" She greeted and moves in to give Susan a peck on the cheek.

"Hey" Susan looks round at the kitchen, which is very modernized.

"You managed to get away from work" Susan asked inspecting the impressive looking kitchen, so impressive you wouldn't think Abby the sort would spend time there.

"Yes I got away at 5" Abby answered opening the seven-foot refrigerator door; the kitchen lighting reflected against the chrome door.

"Wine?" She asked popping her head round the door, raising the bottle up.

"I have just one glass, I'm driving"

"I'm doing a curry for dinner, well actually it's a Balti"

"That's great, I could smell it as I walked through the door, mmm… I love Balti"

Susan lent her back against the work surface; Abby handed over the glass of wine and takes a sip while watching Abby slaving away at the cooker. She winced as the zingyness of her drink woke up her taste buds. Robyn walked in buttoning up her coat ready to go out, she crouched down to zip up Jack's coat too.

"Right I'm off to Hayley's now"

"Ok" Abby nodded as she bends over to get the plates out.

"I guess Saturday a yes then?" Robyn smiled smugly

Abby sighed, "Yes"

"Great you're the best!" Robyn jumped with joy and gives her mom a big hug. She takes Jack by the hand and left after saying their goodbyes. Susan couldn't help smiling their _rare_ mother and daughter bonding. They spend a few moments in silence.

"So what does the boy toy who gave you happiness for the past 20 years look like?" Abby asked tasting the food from the wooden spoon, trying to break the silence between them "Mmm that's good…"

"Boy toy? Would you class him as one if he's 5 years younger?" She frowned.

"Yep I say so, Jake was 8 years younger, and he definitely was one!"

"Oh god! I remember him so well, he really did like you, and you were a bad girl for shacking up with a med student"

"He took our fling seriously, but I only saw it as a bit of fun" Abby chuckled as she sets the table, positioning the cutlery in their respective place.

"Do you remember an actor who made it big in 1990's called Pierce Brosnan? Robert looks a bit like him"

"Oh Susan you got taste after all" Abby tossed her hair as she turned to head back into the kitchen.

"What do you mean by that?" Susan asked following Abby with her arms folded.

"No offence I thought _you know who_ was really ugly" Abby shuddered as she tried not to say the taboo subjects name as she walked to the rice maker with the plates in her hand and a serving spoon in the other. She puts a huge dollop of rice on to the plate and handed one over to Susan. She repeated the same on the other plate. Abby then stepped aside to ladle the Balti on to both piles of rice.

"You mean Chuck?" Susan shook her head "You can say his name"

"Sorry. I thought you'd get upset"

"He's not worth getting upset over… I was blind and needy at the time" She blushed with embarrassment as she walked out of the kitchen to sit down at the table in the dining room. Abby followed.

"You mean blind drunk!" Abby laughed out loud.

"Yeah that's it" Susan chuckled to herself. "The only thing decent came out from him is Cosmo… I wouldn't change him for the world considering I married his bastard father, anyway Robert flying in tonight to help Cos move in his new house while I'm at the conference tomorrow, you should get to meet him while he's here" Susan takes her first mouthful and nodded "Mmm this is yummy"

Abby smiled at her cooking compliment and then noticed Susan's face turned into sadness and dropping her shoulders, drawing in a deep breath.

"You look sad Susan" Abby frowned tilting her head to one side "Did the visit to the grave upset you?"

"It has been an long emotional day for me and yes it was sad seeing his grave, but something else happened there, a gardener died on me"

"Are you having me on?"

"No…" Susan took a sip of the last drop her wine in her glass and shook her head as she swallowed "He had angina and gave him his spray then talked to him about the collection of meds he had in his bag and the next minute he was dead, I tried to revive him but no…"

"I'm sorry Susan for having to go through that," Abby said, sympathetically. She rose up to leave the dining room.

She joked, "Hmm feels like I'm outliving everyone!" Susan's mobile rang and she takes it out from her bag and looks at the screen to see who is the caller - _Robert_. She pressed the button and answered it. "Hi hun…"

"_Hi Suse, I got your text about your surprise reunion with Abby, wow! Anyway I just want to let you know my flight will land at Chicago O'Hare at 11 pm, I'm checking in now, I should be boarding within an hour"_

"Ok I'll meet you later, have a safe journey" She nodded; "I love you…" pulled the phone away from her ear and pressed the button to hang up.

"I love you" Abby mouthed playfully as she walked back in to the table with a jug of water in her hand and pours some in to Susan's glass.

Susan laughed sarcastically at Abby "That was Robert, should be landing at O'Hare about 11" then picks up the glass of water to take another sip before asking her friend "So do you have anyone in your life now?"

"Yes I do" Abby started to smirk.

"What's that look?"

"You know him very well"

"Do I? Give me a guess"

"Tall, dark well not now he's gray and handsome"

"Is he someone we worked with?"

"Yes I still work with him"

Susan took a long pause trying to think the possibilities that could be the new man in Abby's life; especially the one's who is her type. "It's erm… Nah…it can't be… it's not possible he could be married now"

"Go on have a wild guess"

"Oh I don't know… Luka?" Susan shrugged, sticking her bottom lip out.

Abby bursts out laughing "You're absolutely right Susan, it is Luka"

"Really? I would have thought he got hitched to Sam"

"No he didn't, they drifted apart and made it worst when she fell pregnant with his baby and she aborted it because she didn't want another child after Alex."

"That's sad, I bet Luka was gutted"

"Well I can't comment on that" Abby bowed her head shamefully.

Susan tried to get a piece of meat stuck in her teeth with her tongue, then stuck her finger in her mouth still trying to remove it. She managed to fish out the offending carcass. She cocked her head to one side and asked, "Do you ever regret aborting Richard's baby?"

"I knew you were going to bring that up"

"Only because of your expression, come on Abby I can read you like a book"

"Yes I do sometimes considering Robyn turned out a healthy… horrible child"

"Aww she can't be that horrible"

"She's kind of rebelled since her dad died"

"Well kids rebel from a loss and also when their parents split" Susan nodded "Are you giving her enough attention?"

"Who are you… my shrink?" Abby laughed, "Not as much as I like to, I'm too tied up with my job"

"Why don't you do what I did when I was Chief, do more of the administrative work, that's how Weaver got herself to spend more time with her son Henry, I thought I'll do that so I can see my son, but it was still not good enough for Chuck_…_"

Susan was interrupted by Abby's phone ringing. Abby rose up and headed to the phone and answered it.

"Hello?"

"_Hi just to say I'll be home later because I'm snowed under because one doctor gone home sick"_

"No problems, I'll see you when you get home" Abby placed the phone back down on to the receiver and walked back to her seat.

"Hey I saw Ray Barnett's band went to No. 1 on the Billboard Charts" Susan grinned mopping her sauce with a naan bread.

"Yeah" Abby nodded as she used her fork to chase the remaining food left on her plate.

"He did finally go into music. I remember I had a word with him when I was handing out contracts to all interns after their first year. I asked him if medicine is really what he wanted to do as he is so committed to his music. That gave him to think about but he carried on as a doctor"

"He left three years later when his band got successful" Abby said enjoying the taste of her food. "Mmm that good… You would leave if you were making six figure sums"

"I loved the name of his band X-Ray" Susan laughed "His homage to his previous life, and Cos didn't believe me that I said I was his boss!"

"Well kids never believe parents nor have interest in what we have to say" Abby smiled wryly at her.

"Gosh you think how many girls screamed and fainted over him"

"You think how many female patients swooned" Abby laughed, "With that pout of his and boyish charms"

"I can't think who had the better pout. You or Ray?" Susan laughed, jesting at Abby's trademark.

Abby stuck her tongue out at her friend.

"So do you know what he's doing now since his band split?" She asked

Abby picked up the naan bread and tore off a piece "Well Ray never went back into medicine, he became a record producer"

"All the best to him"

"Ray and Neela got engaged at one point"

"Really? I did wonder if they would get it together"

"They only lasted three years"

"I guess they broke up because of Ray's commitment to music?" Susan questioned with an answer as she stabbed a piece of chicken with her fork.

"You've got it"

"So Where's Neela now?"

"At Mercy as Deputy Chief"

"Why did she leave county? Did she want to move to someplace different?"

"No she left because of Greg Pratt" Abby answered after taking a swallow "He was always on her back and Neela couldn't take it anymore, she should have sorted it out but hesitated, I guess poor Neela always had been sensitive"

Susan shook her head "Yes she was a sensitive girl, we all have our sensitive moments especially when you come out of Med school facing the real world. I was a second year resident when Kerry Weaver first came as an Attending, she was constantly on my case, dressing me down and pinching my patients trying to succeed. I would not let her get in the way of my career, I've hardened up. We clashed consent until one day I had this patient with who had an eating disorder causing for him to have heart trouble. I gave Nurse Jarvik orders for Donnatal and she left the whole bottle with him, never guess what? He drank the whole lot…"

Susan took in a breath and continued "I came back to check on him and there was Mark Greene and Kerry Weaver trying to give him a stomach pump. Weaver's sharp tongue was lashing at me unprofessionally in front of the patient and his wife. She scolded at me that it was not the nurse's fault, as it was my responsibility. Mark was not impressed at the bickering had words with us in private, told Kerry to back off me as he said the I was one of gifted young doctors he's known… hmm not that gifted he probably said that because he wouldn't say to her… _I fancy Susan so back off!_ Since then Kerry and I got on fine"

"You are gifted, don't put yourself down, you wouldn't be made a Chief of ER in your thirties ok"

"Ok whatever, from that day with Weaver, I wouldn't take any shit from anyone at work"

"You don't take compliments very well do you?"

Susan quickly replied, "Neither do you?"

Abby paused as she was going to speak. She shrugged "Ok and your reason is?"

"My reason is maybe the way Chuck treated me"

"Did he treat you bad before you left Chicago?"

"Not really, just bemoaned a lot because he was stuck at home with Cosmo, being a house husband, but he wanted it to be that way because I was on good money and earned more than him"

"Anyway you would never guess who Neela finish up marrying?" Abby said, changing the subject trying to avoid stating her own reasons.

"Gallant?"

"Yes!"

"Oh how sweet, they were well suited"

"They have 2 daughters, they got together after Michael came home from the Middle East about a year after her split with Ray"

"What about Archie Morris? I couldn't believe he was made Chief Resident"

"He's dead"

"Dead?" Susan jerked her head up in surprise "What killed him then?"

"Cocktail of drink and drugs" Abby answered picking up her glass "Post mortem did a tox screen and there was traces of Alcohol and amphetamine, but there was a mystery surrounding that someone spiked his drink so no one really got to know if he did it himself, he was at Ray's gig and that didn't look good on him too."

"Yeah but remember Archie liked his weed didn't he?" Susan curled up her top lip "He probably did it himself!"

"Probably"

"Anyway never mind that lot for now, we'll talk about them later, what I really want to know how you and Carter got back together?"


	6. Carby Reunited

**Chapter 6 – Carby Reunited**

"You remembered when he left for Africa to be with Kem?" Abby said, pointing her finger at her friend with the rest of her fingers wrapped round the wine glass.

"Yes, I was so pissed with him at that time" Susan said, placing her fork on to her empty plate.

"Why? Because he left?"

"No… He got the Tenure, I was competing for it too," She answered as she dabbed the napkin on her mouth and then picked up her glass.

"I understand that you were more experienced doctor than him"

"It wasn't the experience it was about money, I had a right go at Weaver about it, as I suspected that he got it because he had money and paying for the Joshua Carter Outpatient Center, their way of saying thanks. Weaver said that because I only published four times in a period of seven years, oh sorry shouldn't I have written when I was on my maternity leave!" Susan lets out a chuckle "I had the nerve to lash out at Weaver, I was so mad, I told her to stick his money up where the sun don't shine!"

"Way to go Susie!" Abby laughed raising her glass.

"You know I love Carter but it's his face, he was so smug and gloating round the ER, oh god I was seething that he left County a few weeks later"

"He was so uppity himself at that time"

"You were still in love with him though"

"Yes but I was bitter and distant with him as I couldn't have him, I carried on my life as normal" Abby said, hunched over leaning her elbows on the table and ran her finger over the rim of her wine glass.

"Anyway carry on…"

"About after a year he left, I heard that Kem's mother fell ill again so they decided they would move there to be close to her and John took a position at a top Parisian hospital. He insisted that Kem didn't need to work if she doesn't want to. So when he's at work at irregular hours, Kem would visit her mother and hang about with her friends, especially one family friend Michel that she was intimate with him in the past. John has had a little jealousy thing about their so-called _platonic friendship _until one day he finished work early, he came home and…"

"Oh no!" Susan gasped as she can guess what happened next.

"Yep he found Kem in bed with Michel…"

"Did he literally walk in on them?"

"No, he heard moaning from the bedroom, so he went up to investigate, when he got upstairs he saw the bedroom door was ajar and saw them both in bed together. He was so shocked he had to go downstairs to get a glass of scotch to calm his nerves, Sat down with a newspaper and while reading it, he waited for them to come down. They were giggling and chasing each other down the stairs, their laughter died when they saw him, John said that you should have seen their faces…"

Susan guffawed. "My god!"

"He kicks her out of his apartment because of her inexcusable behaviour and carried on working at that hospital. What hurt him the most that Kem's friend told him that she never loved him, she was a gold digger after his money, in fact she purposely fell pregnant after they met in Africa, she heard that he was loaded and knew that she would get a lot of money for child maintenance when she plans to leave him"

"What a scheming bitch!" Susan hissed pursing her lips. "Money has never been an issue for you"

Abby shook her head "No, I still love him even if he's skint! Money doesn't always bring happiness, John isn't always happy…"

She rose up from her seat and gestured Susan to the lounge

Susan agreed "True and what happened then?" She followed Abby and they both crashed out on the sofa rubbing their full tummies.

"Well obviously I heard about him, apparently he was so lonely out there but he felt too ashamed to come back to Chicago, facing everyone that his plans for the future has failed. I found out where he was working and managed to get time off at short notice, well work owed me more holiday for the extra hours. I decided to pack a few things and get a flight ticket to Paris. Just before I left I spoke to our French Orthopaedic Doctor, Pierre Philippe for a little French speaking session. If John was in a Spanish speaking country, that would not be a problem because I can speak the language"

"Majority of French people can speak English"

"It wasn't about that, it was a speech I wanted to tell him, I wanted to be romantic by speaking in French"

"What did you say? Did he understand?" Susan asked excitedly

"John spoke French very well after living there a while. I'll tell you what I said in a bit because I haven't finish saying what happened… When I arrived in Paris, I got a taxi to his hospital and hoping that he was on his shift at the Urgences department otherwise I would have camped out at a hotel, and kept coming back to catch him at the right time, as I would guess the hospital wouldn't give out his address so I didn't bother asking. When I arrived at his work, I walked in and my legs nearly gave way as I saw him at the admit desk. I wanted to cry because I was so happy that I had found him and again I was so nervous in case I have underestimated his feelings for me. John was working away on a PC, he looked miserable and haggard, I came up to him and said his name. He doubled looked at me, as he couldn't believe his eyes after seeing me. He was so overwhelmed and speechless. When he found his voice he asked me what I was doing in Paris, I then humiliated myself in front of all of his colleagues trying to speak French giving him my speech"

Abby paused for a second recollecting the words she spoke in French.

"What I remember in French that I said to him… Je suis John désolé que les choses n'ont pas travaillé hors avec vous et Kem. Je suis venu ici prendre vous soutient à la maison à Chicago et espérant que nous commencerait une nouvelle vie ensemble, je sais au fond du coeur que vous m'aimez et je vous aime aussi. Je ne vous ai jamais arrêté d'aimer. Je veux que nous ayons grandis gracieusement vieil et a ensemble des bébés"

"What the hell does that mean?" Susan shook her head, laughing with her mouth wide open.

"It means…" Abby took a pause and laughed out loud with embarrassment "I can't believe I'm telling you this, it's quite cheesy, well I'm hopeless at romantic stuff like speeches. It means... I'm sorry John that things haven't worked out with you and Kem. I came here to take you back home to Chicago and hope that we would start a new life together, I know deep down that you love me and I love you too. I have never stopped loving you. I want us to grow old gracefully together and have babies..."

"Aww that's sweet and that's so not you Abby!"

"I knew I had to do something to get him back and he understood every word"

"And?" Susan cocked her head forward waiting for Abby to follow on her story.

"And he broke down in tears, he pulled me in to a hug and we kissed. We had a fantastic weekend, going on romantic walks, making passionate love, wining and dining. Fixing up what's broken between us. He confessed that he was still in love with me but didn't do anything about it because he thought I disliked him. He thought I was resentful as I hardly spoke to him, I did want to talk but I didn't because it hurts so much when I'm around him."

"That's what happens when you say nothing at all" Susan commented "That's exactly what happened between me and Mark, we liked each other but we didn't do anything about until that day I was leaving Chicago for Arizona, he blurted out that he loved me, I told him that I love him too but I still went…" She had to laugh.

"I told him that you had left County General and he was shocked about it. He did say that he felt guilty taking the tenure from under your nose… Anyway I said to him that the Chief of ER vacancy needed to be filled in, that slot had been empty for nearly a year because they couldn't find a suitable person and Luka wasn't interest at the time. And I said that he should apply for that position, so he did. John and Kerry Weaver both go along way back, he was very lucky because she automatically opened the door for him to have that job. He handed his notice in at his hospital, I helped him pack his stuff at his apartment getting it all ready to be shipped out back to America and I offered him to stay at my place until he finds a house, he actually said to me _I'll stay until 'WE' find a bigger place_. I packed Kem's belongings that she left behind, as he was still hurting, yes it was true he was, though he said he loved me more. I understand what he was saying that he gave everything up back home for this woman and in return he got cheated. I tried to make him feel better by saying that he was only human, we all make mistakes and he said he's made too many especially with me. I replied to him saying that at the end of the day, we were meant to be… no matter how long it took us to get there, it's called fate…"

"Did John ever see or heard from Kem again?"

"Yes when we waiting for our taxi outside the apartment to take us to the airport. We had a box contained her belongings with us to take to the postal office to have it delivered to her mother's house as he may guess Kem was staying there. We were kissing and cuddling on the sidewalk until we heard a voice from behind and we looked, it was Kem. Her eyes looked evil staring at me and said to me in a squeaky voice _huh you couldn't wait to snatch him off me can you Abigail?_ I interrupted her by saying that I took him because he was single and hurting because his girlfriend has shitted on him and a miser. She was dumbfounded, couldn't think of anything to say back to me"

Susan sniggered as she puts her hand in front of her mouth.

"Kem only came by to collect her stuff she had left behind and I wanted to be a bitch to her for hurting John, I picked up the box and said _here you are Makemba_, threw the box at her, her catch was too slow, finished up hitting her right in her face and left her with a bloody nose!" Abby laughed out loud "Then we were saved by the bell because the taxi has pulled up by then, we jumped in and went!"

"My god she deserved that!" Susan snorted in her laugh and asked "So when you both get married?"

"We got engaged almost straight away after getting together again and a year later, I fell pregnant with Robyn, she was born April 2008, my gosh having a baby late in life was tiring as I don't have the same energy as a 25 year old. With being busy juggling with parenthood and work commitments, John as ER Chief and I was an Chief Resident, we never got round to get married. We eventually did at New Year 2013 he took us to a surprise holiday to the Bahamas. We have only been there a few days, he said he has hired a private beach with a servant for the three of us, I thought how sweet of him. When we got there, our friends and families were there, I couldn't believe my eyes and asked him what was going on. He said this is our opportunity to married, I panicked that I have didn't have a dress for the occasion. He said me in my bikini and sarong wrapped round my waist was good enough for him"

"Wow that day sounds so fantastic Abby" Susan smiled broadly trying to hide her tears, as she is touch by his romantic gesture.

"Yeah after the ceremony we partied on the beach, with the barbeque, buffet and music playing. It must be one of the best days of my life… even Maggie behaved herself only because John bribed her in to something to take her meds and Eric is so good these days too keeping up with is meds, he's doing it for his three children, he doesn't want them to go through what we did"

"Wow Eric got three kids, so I guess he got married too?"

"Yes he married Elaine, she's works in marketing"

"Well that's nice that he sorted himself out" She nodded "What did John do to bribe Maggie?"

"Said that he would buy her an Art studio to display her brilliant artwork, as you remember that my mom was an artist"

"I bet she didn't stay on her meds long?"

"Yes she did until she started having that dementia"

"So did John buy her an Studio in the end?"

"Oh yes it's in Tampa bay, it sells prints of her original artwork. Her originals are displayed in the local gallery"

Susan sat back into the sofa "My god we've all had our tragic and bad moments in our life haven't we?"

Abby tilted her head forward as she could seclude her face and starts gasping as if she was struggling for air. Susan jerked up as she is startled by her friend's reaction, watching Abby as she broke down in tears.

"Abby…" Susan said softly pulling her into a hug.

"Oh god! I miss him so much" Abby cried burying her head into Susan's shoulder "Some days I cannot function because part of me has died"

"It's ok let it all out," Susan whispered, closing her eyes trying to soothe her by stroking her hair. She felt a lump in her throat, seeing Abby in a state is putting her on the verge of breaking down too.

"I haven't come to terms with losing John" She whimpered looking at a space on the floor. "I don't think I ever get over it"

"There are some people who never do" Susan nodded with her eyes welling up.

"I don't feel the same way with Luka… I feel bad because I don't know how to say to him that I don't think our relationship is going anywhere. He seems more like a companion than a lover… Do I sound like a selfish bitch? Don't get me wrong that I do love Luka; I think maybe it's too much of a rebound? Maybe I was needy"

"Well Abby you need to talk to him about how you feel, maybe you should tell him that you need the space and need time to recover from your loss, I'm sure he will let you breathe…"

A door slam had interrupted the conversation. Luka popped his weary head through the door. "Hi, I'm home" then saw who was with Abby and grinned broadly "Susan!"

"Oh my god Luka!" Susan gasped wiping away a tear; she shot up from the sofa and gave him hug. "Wow you still look the same except the gray hair"

"You look great and somewhat… cuddly" He commented

"Gee thanks I got this after bearing three children, ok?" She said defensively in a playful way. She is still overwhelmed that she met both Abby and Luka today.

"I'm only joking, you have a pretty good figure for someone at our age"

"Thank you" Susan smiled then quickly glanced at the clock on the wall, which reads 10.15 "Oh gosh, I've got to go"

Abby looked at her watch "Hmm… yes it might take you about half an hour to get there"

"Oh I wish I could stay longer and talk more" Susan said pitiful "perhaps you both would like to go out for a meal with Robert and myself?"

"Yes that be great" Abby and Luka said in unison.

Susan grabbed her coat, they said their goodbyes and she left for the door.

Abby and Luka waved Susan off as they watch her pull away in her SUV as she leaves for the airport to collect Robert

* * *

Susan is sat up in bed flicking through the literature for tomorrow's conference while Robert taking a shower in the en-suite bathroom. She can vaguely hear his voice talking, as her thoughts are miles away coming to terms about Carter's death.

"That meeting was a waste of time" Robert's voice sounded hollow as he shouted from the bathroom. "They wanted to propose for funding for making the hospital pretty by putting up pictures and sculptures. Everyone's protesting at the management who can't get their priorities right like needing more MRI scanners, crash carts and other medical equipment… the place is becoming a joke"

Susan rested her head against the wall, looking up at the ceiling, trying to feed in what her husband is saying but too distracted by her low mood.

"Suse? Did you hear a word I said?"

"What? Erm yes" She mumbled shaking her head. She tossed the papers on to the floor and curled up on her side hogging the entire quilt by wrapping herself in it. She needed that comfort. Susan drew in a deep breath and blew out slowly. Shuts her eyes tight trying to block out her sad thoughts whizzing round her head.

Robert came into the bedroom with towel wrapped round his waist. He tugged the quilt that pulled Susan on to her back. She curled up again on to her side with her shoulders now exposed. As Robert climbed into bed, he snuggled up to Susan from behind, and traced his hand along her arm and planted soft kisses along her shoulder.

"I'm not in the mood Rob…" Susan grumbled, as her eyes are red trying to not to cry.

"Ok honey" He answered jerking his head up with a frown, looking disappointed "Are you ok? You seem very quiet since I arrived"

"I've had a very long emotional day, ok?" She answered firmly letting out a sigh "I discovered today that a good friend of mine was tragically killed few years ago"

"Oh I'm sorry…" Robert moved his head to rest it against Susan's.

"I went to visit his grave to say my goodbye and it didn't help having the cemetery gardener dropping dead on me"

"What? Did you do the heroic measures?"

"Of course, he was too far gone, he had Myocardial Infarction"

"And who was the friend?" He turned his head to whispered in her ear. Susan fluttered her eyes as his breath sent tingling sensation down her spine.

"John Carter, he was married to Abby" Susan replied "I first met John about 30 years ago when he was a fourth year Med student, my god those 30 years have gone quick"

"Oh I thought he might be an old flame" He chuckled

"Yes sort of, we dated for very short time when I came back to the County but he was infatuated with Abby, so in the end we were more like brothers and sisters"

"I must meet this Abby to see the what the hype is about!"

"You seen pictures of her"

"Yeah ages ago, but I'm talking about nowadays."

"She's just some busy grandmother like me"

Susan bit her bottom lip as she is cataloguing her thoughts from her eventful day. Highlighted with the sad moments like learning about John's death. She could no longer hold back her emotions, the tears came streaming down her face and sunk her head deeply into the pillows muffling her cry…


	7. Like Father Like Son?

**Chapter 7 – Like Father Like Son?**

"I'm sorry Cosmo we are seriously under staffed today so you will have to deal with cases on your own, but come to me for authorisation and when in doubt, ok?" Abby yawned handing over a chart, sitting on a stool at the admit desk.

Cosmo nodded as he took the chart and walked to curtain 3. He drew back the curtain and looked at his patient, a burly male who appeared to be creeping up to 60 years of age. He is laid, sat up on the gurney with his arm out having an IV inserted by Jade the nurse. He is breathing erratically, his complexion is pale and clammy.

"Charles Martin?" Cosmo asked with a smile, looking at the chart. The patient nodded in response. "Good morning I'm Dr Martin" He had to laugh at the namesake. Cosmo felt good calling himself "Dr Martin" though he is not yet qualified.

"Likewise" The patient chuckled "Yeah Martin is a fairly common name" He frowned at Cosmo as he reminded him of someone he knew, who's a look-alike but couldn't think where.

"Yep" Cosmo nodded and looked at the chart "So from this triage assessment you tell us you have chest pains?"

He nodded in reply.

"BP?" Cosmo asked, looking at the nurse.

"160/100"

"A bit of on the high side, should be below 140/90" He muttered to himself trying not to think of the textbook. "You generally suffer from high blood pressure?"

"Yes, but I have it under control with my meds"

"Do you have tightness to your chest?" He asked tilting his head to one side.

"Yes I do and I have pains all down one side"

"Ok… Can you unbutton your shirt please?" He asked putting the stethoscope in his ears. He then placed it on his chest when he exposed his skin. "Hmm rapid heartbeat" Taking the stethoscope out of his ears. He quickly glanced at the nurse and asked "CBC and a chest film"

Jade nodded as she noted Cosmo's requests, "Is that it?" She asked, raising her brows, which got the med student worried as if he has missed something out.

"I will have to do an Echocardiography on you," The young doctor demanded. "And I will back with you in a short moment"

Cosmo spotted Abby as he walked out, through the curtains, she is still sat at the admit desk, evaluating a pile of charts. He headed towards her and called out her name. "Dr Lockhart?"

"Yes?" Abby's wavy hair bounced as she looked up, took off her reading glasses to focus better.

"I need authorisation to order an EKG"

"Your diagnosis?"

"Atrial Fibrillation"

"What's his history?"

"He's 58 years old, high BP 160/100, ordered chest films, CBC and he's a truck driver"

"Tell him to stop snacking out at truck stops" She grinned.

"Really… Do I say that to him?" Cosmo curled his top lip up shaking his head, acting naïve.

Abby laughed "Well yes you could say that on his discharge if your final diagnosis matches up your expectations"

"Is that it?"

She shook her head, "No! Are you telling me that you want to order EKG and you haven't got the test result back from the lab?"

"Well erm… the nurse just doing it now"

Abby sighed rubbing her forehead, her teething problem is starting now with Cosmo's lack of organization.

He slapped his forehead as he remembered something else. "Oh yes he says that he has pain all down one side"

"Where? His arm or his body?"

"I didn't ask specifically"

Abby closed her eyes gently in disbelief "I think need to check him over as I suspect it maybe something else"

Abby took the chart from Cosmo and looked at it. She blinked hard as she forgets that her eyes are not as good as they used to be, she puts her glasses on again. She quickly scanned the details from his assessment.

"I need to see if there's DVT underlying his problem… and Cosmo, next time can you please pay a special attention when you are with a resident who orders tests, I can't believe you've forgot the Chem-7!"

"Huh? No wonder the nurse looked at me funny…" He shook his head as he followed Abby to curtain 3.

"Hello Mr Martin I'm…" Abby stuttered as she drew back the curtain to introduced herself. She blinked hard as she instantly recognized the face, its Chuck. The shock from seeing him, who coincidently happens to be in the same time and place as Cosmo where he is working caused Abby to cut up her words. "Dr… Lock…hart"

"Hey Abby… Long time no see!" Chuck grinned.

Cosmo frowned and looked at his boss wondering if they already know each other.

"Will you excuse me for a moment?" Abby cocked her head to one side, forcing a smile. She ushered Cosmo out through the curtain and headed to the admit desk.

"Cosmo I'll deal with this one myself," She demanded.

"Why?"

She shrugged her shoulders "It's complicated"

"What? But he's my patient and I'll never learn this way if you do this"

"Yes this is different"

"How different?"

"Anyway you are only a med student and do you always question your superiors Mr Martin?" Abby scolded glaring her eyes into his. Cosmo's emerald eyes glared back at her and snatched a chart from the rack on the counter. Abby lets out a sigh with relief watch him walk to the waiting room. She feels bad having to turf her intern away from his patient, but she doesn't want to face any repercussions for him.

* * *

"So do you see any of the old gang then?" Chuck asked rubbing his chin. 

"Not really, people move on" Abby replied looking down scribbling on the chart.

"I've only been back in Chicago a year"

Abby nodded, she is staying calm as she could lash out at him for what he put Susan through.

"Can you undo your buttons, I would like to listen to your heart" Abby glanced at Chuck over her reading glasses and then noticed a wedding band on his left hand as he is unbuttoning his shirt.

"I've been working all over the place like Alaska, Texas and just got back from Denver"

"Oh good for you" Abby sighed as she is really not bother about his life story and then puts her stethoscope in her ears and places it on his chest.

"I don't know if you heard that Susan and I split up, she went off with another guy and never saw my son again"

Abby blinked hard looking at Chuck when she listens to his heart and thought to herself… _You liar!_

"Your heart is beating rapidly and irregularly," She said, pulling away the stethoscope from her ears.

"Well I do have angina"

"You suffer from palpitations?"

"Not really"

"Your heart sounds a little different from angina attack," She said placing her stethoscope round her shoulders "You might have DVT – Deep Vein thrombosis, I need to look at your legs"

"I thought so… that stupid kid doctor wouldn't listen, full of self importance"

"Do you mind not talking about my member staff like that please," Abby scolded.

"He knew sweet fuck all ok?"

"Hasn't it occurred to you that he's only a med student and has a lot to learn and adapt in this place?"

"Whatever…" He snapped "I'll have to take my trousers off cos I can't roll the damn thing up"

"Ok, I'll come back in a minute when you get them off" Abby drew back the curtain to leave.

"Hey Abby"

"What?" She poked her head through the curtains

"You're still a little sexpot aren't you?" Chuck laughed as he unzips his trousers.

Abby closed the curtains in disgust. She shuddered as she heads to the admit desk.

* * *

"Where's the med student who ordered Mr Martin in curtain 3, a EKG before getting results back from the lab?" Kerry asked, browsing at the board then screeched, "For god sake we don't have money for this kind of thing!" 

"It's ok Kerry, it hasn't been ordered" Abby replied entering the desk placing a file in a tray.

"So why hasn't it been wiped off?"

Abby walked around Kerry's electric wheelchair, picked up a board wiper and erased Cosmo's name and the EKG. Wrote her name in place, smiling forcefully back her.

"Abby I've come in to help cover the staff shortage, if that's ok with you?"

"Oh thank you Kerry that's good of you, as long as you remember that I'M the boss ok?"

"If you say so Lockhart," She replied dryly. She shifted the gear in reverse and Abby quickly jumped back to prevent getting her toes crushed. "You know I like to keep active. Oh by the way you remember that letter about someone who wanted the ER to be refurbished? We still haven't a clue who it is"

"Maybe _he_ or _she_ wants to remain anonymous"

The ambulance bays doors crashed open and two EMT's rushing in with a patient.

Weaver whizzed round the admit desk to catch up with the EMT's pushing the gurney.

"What we got?" Kerry asked as her hair flickered from wind rushing from the speed of her chair. Abby joins in the rush.

"Female 21, head injury, blunt trauma to tib/fib, hit by a car, 120/80, O neg and she's shocky" said EMT Reilly.

"Ok put him trauma 1"

"Are you gonna treat him?" A friend of the patient asked worriedly if Kerry is capable of doing her job.

"Yes I am and who are you?"

"How are you gonna reach?" Shaking his head. "I'm her boyfriend"

The EMT stopped the gurney in the middle of the trauma room. Kerry parked herself beside the gurney and the nurse gathered rounding up the equipments.

"Pulse 140 and BP is now 140/100" Abby said standing opposite checking the vitals.

Everybody looked to see where the mechanical whirring was coming from. It was Kerry pressing the button on the control panel to elevate the wheelchair up then stopped when she reached her desired level. Abby had to laugh, not at Kerry because she has seen her do it many times, she laughed at the patient's boyfriend, who's jaw dropped to the floor watching her rise up in the air. He couldn't believe his eyes.

"CBC, Chem-7 UA and can someone get me the portable from radiology please and call the OR?" Kerry demanded.

"I'll do that," Said the white haired Hispanic nurse, hanging up the IV bags on the stand.

"Thanks Chuny"

"Abby, I can take care of this one ok? You can go back to your patient"

"Are you sure? Page me if you have any problems"

"Thanks" Kerry nodded as she watched Abby snapping off her gloves as she leaves the room.

"O-neg are up"

"Good bilateral breath sounds" said Kerry listening through her stethoscope "Abdomen fine and just deep laceration on the scalp where she hit her head"

"Portable's here, it was in trauma yellow" Chuny said pushing the equipment through the door.

"That's great" Kerry smiled putting on blue shield bib over her. "Someone shut the door, going take some x-ray"

A craggy looking surgeon with white curly hair and glasses pushed the door open with both hands; his surgical Sub-I intern, a young blonde female, followed him in the trauma room.

"What have we got here?" Dubenko asked, flicking his curls back away from his eyes looking up at Kerry. He still has the same hairstyle after all these years.

"Blunt trauma to tib/fib, were waiting for the x-ray results" Kerry informed him.

"X-ray results here!"

Dubenko took the films from Chuny and raised them up in the air against the bright light with Weaver tilting her head to one side to glance at them.

"Hmm her right leg is shattered, she be lucky if she doesn't lose that leg, ok lets get her to the OR" He ordered. They wheeled the patient out of the room.

* * *

Abby headed back to the curtain three reading through her chart. 

"Abby" Luka said, coming up from behind "Can I have a word in the lounge please?"

"Sure" She followed him into the lounge, Luka closed the door after her.

"I see you took Cosmo on and off a case?" He asked

"Did he tell you this?" Abby whipped off her glasses.

"Yep"

"Oh great!" She said and then sarcastically mimics a cry "Boo hoo I must go to the Chief of Staff cos Abby wont let me play doctor"

"Don't be so sarcastic Abby!"

Abby raised her brows at Luka; a little smile crept on her face as she finds him a turn on when he is angry.

"Why?" He barked in his thick accent.

"He's a relative, you know the rules Luka," She pouted at him.

"He didn't tell me that"

"He wouldn't know" Abby gently folded her arms and whispered, "Because it's his father. Chuck"

"What?" His head jerked up in surprised and bit his bottom lip "Now he's has a good opportunity for a good pasting what he did to Susie"

"Just drop it Luka" Abby sighed "That doesn't sound good coming from the Chief of Staff"

Luka pursed his lips "I just get angry with men who mistreat women"

"I know hun… at the end of the day he is a patient, he has to be treated the same as the others even though I have the desire to give him a lethal dose" She puts on an evil grin then starts to play with his tie and then Luka leaned forward to kiss her.

"Have a word with Cosmo and explain the reason," Luka mumbled in their kiss.

Abby broke the kiss and pushed herself away from him "Luka, I erm we need to talk"

"What about?" He moved his eyes to look out of the window and spotted Cosmo coming towards the lounge, he quickly broke away from the kiss and nodded at the direction of the door "He's coming"

"Ok" Abby rolled her eyes and rubbed her forehead.

"So why I couldn't treat him then?" Cosmo interrupted with a frown, walking into the lounge.

"I leave you both to it" Luka leaves the room.

"Because he's a relative, ok?" She answered.

"A relative? I don't know him from Adam, oh I get it because the guy has got the same surname as me" He scoffed and said "Oh I'll remember that every patient that comes in here called Martin, I shall not bother treating them"

"No need to be sarcastic" Abby frowned at him

"Don't forget that I am not my mother you know, sweet and sincere" Cosmo shook his head, towering over his boss's petite frame.

"I damn well know you're not like your mom!" She growled, "You have your father's attitude, you've have his drive for determination"

"Oh so you knew my father that well"

"I don't want to have this conversation ok? Cut the shitty attitude you've only been here a few days" She then pointed her finger up at him "So don't push it"

"Yeah I will push it" Cosmo walked to the door to leave the room "because I've heard that you were the one with an attitude when you first came here!"

Abby jaw dropped to the floor and scoffed in disbelief. _Is this Abby Lockhart the next generation, the male version?_

"Get it sorted then?" Luka asked as he walked back in to the lounge with one hand in his pocket.

"Yes" Abby seethed in her acknowledgment.

"So what is you wanted to talk about?"

"It doesn't matter, I'll talk to you about it later" She heads to the door.

"I want to talk about it now" Luka reached his hand out to grab hold of her arm.

"This isn't the time and place Luka" She snatched her arm out of his hand.

"I'm not letting you go out there until you tell me what's bothering you"

"Ok you want to know what's bothering me?" Abby snapped, "Us"

"What about us?"

"I don't think it's going anywhere"

"What you mean not going anywhere"

"For god sake Luka will you stop repeating what I'm saying!"

"But I don't understand" He moaned in his thick accent shrugging his shoulders "I thought everything was going ok and the sex is great, I must be blind if I'm missing something what you can see"

"It's not about the sex Luka! It's the connection between you and me, we don't talk. Well no… you don't talk. In fact you have never changed since when we first dated 25 years ago!"

"What is it with you women?"

Abby clutched her head "I've made a mistake by going out with you, look I am very fond of you, it's just I haven't got over John yet. I can't seem to move on as I am still hurting"

Luka looked at Abby pursing his lips "I do understand what you are going through"

"Yes of course Danijela, Marko and Jasna…" Abby bit her bottom lip "I'm sorry Luka, I can't do it now"

"Guess there's no us?"

"I don't know Luka" Abby said, looking down staring at the empty space on the floor. "I just don't know what I want…"

* * *

"Let's look at your legs" Abby said forcing a smile as she drew back the curtain. She leaned over the gurney to examine his legs by tracing her hand over them. She noticed a huge swelling on his left leg around the calf. 

"Mmm you have a nice touch," He muttered in his smile.

Abby grimaced when she paused to bite her tongue, keeping herself from saying something that would get her in to trouble. She looked up at the Nurse and asked "Jade, can you get 5000 U EV bolus dose of heparin?" then swung her head to look at Chuck "You have DVT, I will give you a heparin jab to stop the clotting, we will get you something to elevate the leg and we should keep you in for observation"

"I can't believe I've got DVT"

"They can but anyone you can get them from sitting down for periods of time, like on a long haul flight and according to your notes you are now a truck driver, which means you don't stop for breaks as often as you should"

"I know and yes I'm a truck driver" He lowered his head, shamefully. "I can't have many stops, we have a deadline to meet"

"So you didn't like nursing in the end?"

"I lost my licence through wrongful accusation"

"Oh?" Abby nodded "I won't ask you why…"

"What you mean?"

"Here you are Dr Lockhart," said Jade as she walked in, interrupting their conversation, handing over the heparin jab.

Abby rubbed the alcohol wipe on to his left thigh then injects the heparin. "Ok, you will get another dose in…

"6 hours… Maintain aPTT 2 times the control" Chuck interrupted, nodding his head. "Yeah yeah I haven't forgotten my medical knowledge"

"Well you if know it all, I wont bother wasting my breath" She raised her brows as she noted in the chart "You can relax while I go and input your assessment on to the PC"

"Can someone call my wife and tell her I'm here please?"

"We can do that"

Abby headed to the admit desk, cataloguing in her thoughts in her head what he said and putting two and two together like _She left me for another man_ and _lost my licence through wrongful accusation. _Then again he was a little flirtatious with her… There are always two sides to every story; Susan wouldn't ever lie to Abby… _would she?_

Chuck shuffled off the bed to open the curtains a little to watch the ER world go by, as he felt shut out from it all. He glanced at the young nurse who was assisting Abby and Cosmo earlier. He heard her called Cosmo by his first name and waved at him in a flirtatious way. Chuck amused himself at the nurse who has a crush on the med student until it had dawned on him that the 'Dr Martin' who saw him could possibly be his long lost son, the son he hasn't seen since he was three years of age. Now he can see Susan in him… He jerked up from the bed, dragging the IV stand along with him out in the ER.

"Erm Mr Martin can you go back to your bed? You need to keep that leg of yours elevated!" Abby shouted as she looked up with the phone to her ear.

Chuck glared at Abby and pointed at her "I have a bone to pick with you Lockhart! How dare you keep him away from me you bitch!" He shouted clutching his chest and collapsed on to the floor…


	8. Music From The Youth

Spoiler Referral: 11.9 - 'Twas the Night

**Chapter 8 – "Music From the Youth"**

The trauma doors crashed open when they pushed the gurney through. They parked it next to the trauma bed.

"On my count" Abby said, grabbing hold of her patient "One, Two, Three"

They lifted Chuck on to the bed. They pulled the lamps down and wired him up.

"He's in fib," Chuny announced looking at the cardiac monitor.

"Paddles!" Abby shouted. "Can someone call Cardiology?"

Jade gave Abby the paddles. She squeezed gel onto them. Abby rubbed them together and placed them on his chest

"Turn the volume to 200" She instructed, "Ok, clear!"

The body jolted.

"Nothing" Abby said holding up the paddles and placed them back on the chest again. "250. Clear!"

Chuck's body jolted up again.

"No pulse"

Abby turned to Chuny, stood next to the crash cart "Charge up to 300"

"Clear!"

Chuck's chest bounced of the paddles.

"Normal sinus" Chuny grinned swinging her head to look at Abby.

"Good work guys" Abby praised her colleagues "Lets get him up to Cardiology"

* * *

"Admire you to run a free clinic for the poor" said a tall distinguished gentleman.

"Thank you" Susan smiled holding a polystyrene cup of coffee.

"I'm surely you get hassled by drug addicts coming to your place. Demanding drugs as it is a free clinic" Another doctor asked.

"It's no different to any other hospitals" Susan replied with a forced smile.

Susan looked down at her cup and blew out a sigh. The conference turned out to be a meaningless boring event. She removed the cell phone from her bag. She checked it for messages and shoved it back.

"Dr Lewis?" said voice from behind and chuckled "You are Dr Lewis aren't you?"

Susan turned round to look and her jaw dropped to the floor. "Oh my god Greg Pratt!"

They embraced in to a hug and glanced at each other smiling.

"Wow" Susan shook her head "What you doing these days Greg?"

"I'm a physician for the Chicago Bulls" He replied. He is smartly dressed in an Armani designer suit and the light reflected from his shaven head.

Susan gasped then laughed, "You funny that, my youngest son Cameron watches basketball all the time and I always thought their doctor on the courtside looked familiar!"

"Yep that's me! I've been working for them for 10 years now" Pratt grinned, "You look great Susie! You have more children?"

"Yes three, two boys and a girl"

"Hey I remember Cosmo, he must be all grown up now"

Susan nodded "He's just started his 3rd year as med student"

"Takes after his mother" Greg said. He paused to think. Something about Cosmo's age had dawned on him "but he's only 23… Is he a genius?"

Susan grinned smugly. "Yeah only did two years of college instead of four"

Greg shook his head in amaze. He said, "I have boy and a girl"

"Wow"

Susan and Greg both sat down and spent a moment giving each other brief stories about what they had been up to the past 20 years.

"Yeah what ever happened to Deb Chen?" Susan asked "I never saw her again after quitting on me, on Christmas Eve. Couldn't get anyone to cover for her because she wanted to look after her father"

"Erm I don't know what happened to Jing-Mei" Greg bowed his head as he remembered that night when her father died. He would rather forget what he witnessed. "I think she went to China to deal with her father's business"

"Oh?" Susan nodded and arched her brows.

They sat in silence for a few minutes.

"This conference isn't what I expected" Susan commented. "Maybe I'm just not in the mood. Too many things are on my plate at the moment"

Greg replied. "I guess you heard about Carter then?"

"Yes. Abby told me yesterday. I can't get over it."

"She tried looking for you"

"Yes I know. I was hiding in New York…"

* * *

Robyn lay, stretched out on the couch watching television while Jack is playing with his toys. She is getting annoyed with him, as he wants her to play. Robyn much rather have her eyes fixated on the plasma screen, watching a classic rock video and swigging her can of cola.

Presenter from the TV announced _"Hey welcome to VH-1's "Music from the Youth" A show with your favorite celebrity choosing 5 of their favorite tracks from their Youth"_

Jack handed a toy to Robyn, blocking her view. She pushed him away "For god sake Jack, go away!"

Abby strode into the lounge with a mug of Coffee in her hand. She placed it down on the table. Crashed out on the single seated settee. She rubbed her forehead letting out a long sigh.

"Oh? Hi I didn't hear you come in," Robyn said turning to look at her mother."Huh not another bad day… Don't you ever have good day? God you are _so_ miserable"

Abby cocked her head to one side "Why don't you try lifting your ass off the couch and run the ER alone? You wouldn't last one minute in there. You're not capable of dealing with crisis. And in fact you're not even capable being a mom"

"Uh! Go to hell!" Robyn scoffed and quickly jumped on her feet.

"Sit down!" Abby yelled. Anger flashed in her eyes. Robyn winced as she slowly sat back down. "How dare you talk to me like that? What is the hell wrong with you?"

Jack started to cry, startled from his grandmother's outburst.

"Oh I'm sorry sweetie" Abby rose up on to her feet, picking up Jack and gave him a cuddle. "Hush it's ok"

The voice on TV attracted Abby's attention _"Welcome a former X-ray star, now record producer Ray Barnett"_

"Hey it's that guy you used to work with," Robyn pointed at the screen.

"Yep" Abby answered, stepping back to be seated on to the settee again. Jack is resting on her lap. She arched her brows at Robyn "You and I need to have a talk…"

Robyn sneered "What now?"

"Yes. Now" She said, firmly.The former colleague on screen distracts Abby again.

_So Ray tell us what are your thoughts when you were a judge on American Idol?"_

Ray pouted looking at the camera. _"Well you know Tommy, you don't realise how many raw talents we have out there…"_

"I bet he was hot when he was younger" Robyn blew a bubble with her gum, twiddling her finger round a loose strand of hair.

"I didn't look at him like that"

"Well yeah I can't see you looking at younger guys"

"What do you know about me and younger guys?" Abby half smiled.

"Oh yeah I forgot… Jake"

"Exactly"

"He is kinda hot now for a forty something" Robyn commented, taking a swig of her cola.

_"Erm… Ok… Before you tell us your selection, we hear you are taking a break from everything?" _

_"Yes I am, I have spent years studying medicine, being a doctor, becoming a rock star, touring with the band, then a producer, that's a hell of a lot of work done over 20 years"_

The Presenter asked _"So what are you planning on doingduring your break?"_

Ray replied,_ "I am going to chill out but I'm doing one thing first. I am in a process of doing a reunion, at the hospital where I used to be a doctor"_

Abby shook her head and carried in listening. Jack got down from her knees and ran to his play area.

"Wow Ray that's a lot of hard work researching and tracing people down" 

"_Well with the money I have earned…"Millions" anything possible!" _Ray laughed.

_"Why the reunion? Is it an anniversary?"_

"_Yes it will be 150 years since the hospital been opened. I am going over the top by trying to reunite all the doctors, nurses who have worked in the ER."_

"_Surely Ray, that will be hundreds of people…"_

"_Depends if they are dead or alive…?"_ He interrupted

Abby raised her brows and took a hard swallow as one dead colleague came to her mind, her hubby… Carter.

"Have you received an invitation?" Robyn asked

"No" Abby replied "Why would I need one if I work there?"

_"Ok Ray, is there anything else you like to add?" _

_"Yes" _Ray pointed at the camera _"Abby…"_ He looked at the presenter _"She's the ER Chief"_

Abby jumped out of her seat in shock.

Robyn gasped "Oh my god Mom, he said your name!"

"Shush Robyn" Abby raised her hand up and leaned forward to listen carefully.

_"If you are watching this? You may have had a gesture from an anonymous person about refurbishing the ER with the state of the art equipment? Yes it was me. Surprise!"_

"Oh my god record this Robyn!" Abby gasped. Waving her hand, she demanded "Quickly get the disc in the recorder"

"No mom it's too late now"

"Damn" She gritted her teeth.

_"I am doing this for the hospital because I would not got where I am today if it hasn't been for them"_

_"That's great Ray… Now your first track to play is Papa Roach – Last Resort"_

"_Yeah that track sure does rock!"_ Ray pouted showing the devil symbol with his hand.

"It's ok Mom, this repeats at 11 o'clock tonight"

"Oh good, that's a job for you, record it" Abby said, excitedly. She rose up and rushed to the telephone. "I need to phone the hospital and tell them the identity of the person who gave the donation"

* * *

Luka strode along the corridor and spotted Cosmo wandering.

"Hey why are you still here?" Luka asked placing his hands on his hips "You should have gone few hours ago"

"I had some assignments to do" Cosmo replied.

"Well you better get off. I don't want any burnt out students in this hospital. Ok?"

"Yes sir" He nodded "See tomorrow"

Luka nodded and walked away. Cosmo watched him heading to the admit desk. He noticed a woman in her forties looking lost at the counter. Cosmo walked up to her to assist.

"Can I help you ma'am? You look a little lost"

"Yes I had a phone call about my husband. I believe that he has been admitted"

"Well I can find out for you" Cosmo smiled at his offering "His name please?"

"Oh yes silly me I should have told before" She laughed, "His name is Chuck Martin, I mean Charles Martin. Chuck is his nickname"

Cosmo froze in shock after hearing his father's name.

She frowned "Is everything ok you look a bit…"

Cosmo shook his head "I'm ok. I'll erm… find out… for you" He stuttered in shock, pointing at the admit desk.

To be continued…


	9. Till We Meet Again

**Chapter 9 – "Till We Meet Again"**

Cosmo exited the admit desk. He took in a deep breath to calm his nerves. He has found it overwhelming after learning that his patient turned out to be his biological father.

"Mrs Martin. I am afraid that your husband is up at the ICU" Cosmo said.

"Oh my god!" She gasped. "It's his heart! Can I see him?"

"I can take you up there"

"Thank you"

They made their way to the elevator to ride up to the ICU floor. When they reached the floor, they stepped out and strode along the corridor. Cosmo ushered the woman in to designated place and opened the door. Her eyes raced round the room to search for her husband. She found him and rushed to his side. She started to cry, clasping his hand.

Chuck is laid on the bed all wired up. The monitor is bleeping away. Cosmo stood staring at his father with a lump in his throat.

"Will he wake up?" Mrs Martin interrupted Cosmo from his stare.

He shook his head and blinked hard "He is heavily sedated"

"I don't want him to die," She sobbed.

"He is being well looked after" He reassured her. "We have the best team here"

"How am I going to tell the kids?"

"Kids?"

"Yes we have two boys" She replied "Eldest is 12 and the other 10"

Mrs Martin leaned over to kiss Chuck on his forehead. She looked at Cosmo with mascara streaks down her face. "I need to go freshen myself up and make a phone call. Will you still be here when I come back?"

"I'll stay here until you get back."

"That's kind of you. Are you his doctor?"

"No I am a Med Student. I assessed him in the ER this morning."

Cosmo watched Mrs Martin leave the room. He moved closer, standing by the bed and leaned over to take another look at Chuck. Cosmo had mixed feelings, feelings of emotional and anger about his new found Father. Cosmo dragged a stool and seated himself. He started to talk to Chuck in a soft tone.

"Hi, it's me Cosmo. Your long lost son. Did you ever think about me and wondered what sort of person I turn out to be? Well I don't know where to start. I guess it's easier talking to you like this. I have many questions and so many whys? How things could be different. I don't know what to say if you were staring in to my eyes. I really wanted to know why a loving guy turned into monster over night? What if you didn't drink so much would we all still be together as a happy family and you be a good father to me? Why did you hurt Mom? Why, why, why? I hate you, I hate you so much for doing that. Taking away the dignity from the kindest and generous loving person. You almost destroyed Mom. She was in pieces, she wouldn't have pulled through if it hasn't been for me. She knows that life was worth living, bringing up her child. Mom knew that she wouldn't let you win. No she wouldn't let a bastard like you take over her life." 

Cosmo coughed to clear that _lump_ feeling in his throat. He sat there in silence for a minute.

He continued "Another part of me feels happy that I have found you. I always felt there was something missing in my life. I always felt that I didn't belong to Robert even though he bought me up. Don't get me wrong, I do love him. He did what every father does for his son. Football, baseball, fishing and boys campfire weekend. Mom always treated me, my brother and sister the same. Even though I have made things difficult for her. Hey isn't that what kids do? She always stood by me through bad and good times. I am not a perfect son. No one's perfect we all have our flaws. I am curious about the person you are now. Do have your mannerisms? Do I have your temper? Mom doesn't have a temper so I must get it from you…"

Cosmo's talk was cut short when Mrs Martin entered the room.

"Everything's sorted. Got my sister to look after the kids so I can stay here" She said with a sad smile.

"Till we meet again" Cosmo said to Chuck and he rose up on to his feet. He nodded and left the room.

* * *

Susan got out from the SUV and looked at the beautiful suburbia. Trees lined both side of the road. The fallen autumn leaves swirling in the wind. Susan climbed up the steps to the house and knocked on the door. She grinned when the door opened. 

"Hey!" Susan laughed with her arms wide open to give her daughter-in-law Debbie, a big hug. She followed her in to the kitchen. Susan took an inspection of the room. "Wow"

"Beautiful isn't it?" Debbie smiled.

"Nana" A little voice from behind.

"Hey sweetie" Susan bent over to pick up her granddaughter. "How's my favorite little girl? Ooh you are getting heavier by the day…"

"Mollie has been helping mommy haven't you?" Debbie smiled and suddenly winced.

"You ok?" Susan cocked her head.

"I feel a bit sickie" She laughed nervously "Probably just nerves and stress with all this moving house business"

Susan cocked her head further looking into to Debbie's eyes. She smiled as she suspected that it is something else. "Is that so?"

"Erm Coffee?" Debbie asked awkwardly, changing the subject..

"Yes please" Susan smiled and glanced at the boxes scattered around the place. "I see the UPS brought all the packing here in time"

"Yeah thank god" She blew out a sigh of relief "The agency didn't hand the keys over gone 10.30. Robert and I were waiting around since 9 O'clock. I was panicking when UPS arrived at 10.15. They said they would give the agency 20 minutes to come otherwise they would unload everything in street because they had another client to go to"

Susan scoffed in disbelief. "That would make it twice as hard for you. Not everyone has one those stack trolleys. Imagine carrying all the boxes up those steps"

"Robert was stressing out big time down the phone to get their asses here in time!"

Susan chuckled lowering Mollie down to her feet and watched her run out of the back door. She turned to the window to look out to watch her granddaughter playing outside. Her eyes marvelled at the view of the garden.

"Wow the size of your garden! Perfect for Mollie and the little brother or sister on the way…" Susan turned to look at Debbie. She startled by Susan's smart guessing. Susan gave her a hug. "I'm thrilled"

"God you scare me, you don't miss a thing do you?"

Susan grinned. "That's what you get for being a doctor"

"I only found out yesterday morning. No one knows yet" Debbie sighed. "Wasn't planning to say anything, not for a few weeks"

"Its ok, secrets with me"

"Thanks" She smiled "You're the best mother-in-law anyone can have"

Susan laughed, "I wouldn't push it!"

Robert walked in to the kitchen and patted Susan on the bum.

"Oh" Susan was taken by the surprise.

"I thought I heard your voice" Robert smiled, leaning over to kiss Susan. "How's your day go?"

"Uh lousy and boring"

"That bad huh?"

She nodded "The good thing about that is that I bumped into Greg Pratt"

"Another interesting reunion. Have you seen the lounge?" Robert asked gesturing her through.

Susan gasped as she walked through. "My god you managed to erect all the furniture since 10.30 this morning?"

"Well I don't think Cosmo will have the time especially starting on the wrong week"

"Anyway where is he?" Susan asked.

Debbie shrugged "I don't know. He should have been here an hour ago"

"He's doing it on purpose to avoid any heavy labor," Robert laughed.

"Talking about me?" Cosmo walked in. He glanced round the place. "Wow you both have done some work here"

"Dadda" Mollie jumped up.

"Hey" He picked her up and leaned over to kiss his wife "Thanks Deb" and looked at Robert "Thanks…_Dad_"

"No worries kiddo" Robert smiled, tapping a screwdriver against his palm of his hand.

Susan frowned at Cosmo's tone when he spoke to Robert.

"I'm sorry that I'm late back. I got held up in something really important" Cosmo eyes flashed at his Mother. This took Susan by surprise, she knew this is so unlike him.

They spent the next few hours putting all the household stuff in their irrelevant place.

* * *

"Anyone hungry?" Cosmo asked grabbing the keys "I'm going to fetch a Chinese take-out"

"Yeah great idea" Robert and Debbie replied in unison.

"I'm come with you" Susan asked drying her hand on the towel.

"It's ok mom I can manage myself" Cosmo abruptly left the room and slammed the front door.

Susan narrowed her eyes biting her bottom her lip. She went after him.

"Cosmo wait" Susan shouted as she rushed down the steps. Cosmo swung round to face her. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing" He sighed.

"Come on, I know that look."

"Mom I'm just tired out" Cosmo shrugged his shoulders getting in the drivers side.

She muttered under her breath. "I don't believe you."

"I heard that."

"I am your Mother. Hell! I can say what I like," She snapped.

He sighed gripping the steering wheel. "I guess I'll need a hand but all you want to squeeze out what's bothering me"

"That's what mothers are for" Susan smiled forcefully. Walked round to get in the passenger side and buckled up. They spent a few moments in silence.

"I don't know Chicago very well, well not yet. Where would you recommend for a Chinese?"

Susan had to laugh, "Well you have driven past three of them so far. Hmm I can tell you're very distracted"

Cosmo doesn't say word.

"Come on talk to me. Have you had a bad day at work? Is there something troubling you?" Susan asked with her head cocked to one side looking at her son.

Cosmo doesn't reply and puts on the indicators to turn left into a quiet secluded street. Susan frowned at where he was directing the vehicle.

"I won't stop until you tell me what's wrong"

Cosmo slammed his foot on the brake. The SUV skidded along for a short distance and jerked to a halt after hitting the kerb.

"Ugh! Fucking hell Cosmo!" Susan swore out loud when was winded by the seat belt and it had also cut into her shoulder. She winced rubbing herself "What the hell are you doing? Are you trying to get us killed?"

Cosmo sat still, staring out of the window. He can feel anger rising inside him.

"Can't believe you did that, that was so stupid of you. How dare you do that!" She groaned in pain trying to unbuckle her belt. "Your moods lately starting to remind me of someone."

"My moods? You really wanna know what's up with me?" Cosmo seethed, draping his arm over the steering wheel. He waved his finger "Your so called friend Abby lied to me"

Susan's face grimaced "What?"

"She kept me away from a patient. I didn't know he was. She didn't tell me why. It all came clear when his wife came along and asked for him."

"Who was he?" She shook her head.

"My Dad!"

Susan's eyes widen in horror and gasped with both hands over her mouth…


End file.
